snakeguy

so there were a few wacky scientists here for our workshop. one of them was snakeguy, an expert from harvard who had never been to the congo, or africa for that matter, but is a snake fanatic and knows just about every species on the planet. snakeguy speaks no french and we were quite surprised he came.
snakeguy told us how he has been bitten 12 times by venemous snakes. someone says "wow, you must spend a lot of time in the jungle!" he replies, "no actually, most of the bites were in my house." snakeguy really wanted to bring home a Gabon Viper to add to this collection. it's this huge sausage-like snake that is about as thick as my thigh and 4 feet long and has the largest teeth of any snake on earth. after the conference he sets out from the hotel, alone, to find a gabon viper and somehow get the permits to bring it back to the US. out of the 250 random solicitors outside the hotel, what do ya know he immediately finds precisely someone outside who has one to sell! of course, that person doesn't really have a viper, they just want to steal snakeguy's camera and scam him out of 100 bucks and that's what they do. poor snakeguy. streetsense!